Monday, January 30, 2006
Funny Old Email
Here is an email that I sent to Missy a while back. I was looking for an email from the same month and stumbled upon this one. I think its funny, most would think it crazy, but it's all part of the effect...
Anyway, here it is:
Anyway, here it is:
How's it with you Missy-Lou?
I downloaded a couple of songs today, the legal way. I purchased them off of I-Tunes, and an album from Amazon.com. I haven't gotten a list today, so I've just been putsin' around for a while. I will get to work soon on my alternative to our Noble System (it's the application that the agents use to call people with).
Anyway, I'll let you know what songs I got. The album is "The Kinks - The Ultimate Collection" (they were part of the British Invasion of the 60's, and I really like one of there songs so I had to get it). I got "Good Vibrations" and "God Only Knows" from the Beach Boys, "Megalomaniac" from Incubus, and "Floating in Space" by Spiritualized; all from I-Tunes for a buck a piece. That program is wonderful, except that I couldn't find my favorite Kinks song and now I have to wait a week to hear it.
So I tried calling you on your cell phone and couldn't get through, what's the deal baby? Are you still upset that I ditched you in that dream of yours last night. I wouldn't do that you know, not about a food controversy.
Speaking of food, I am eating tuna fish and I think I have some dolphin morsels in it. The container states that the contents are dolphin safe, but are they, are they really? How would the packaging company possibly know that there are no dolphins in the tuna fish purée? Is the dolphin meat a different color? Does it have a distinct odor that sets it apart from the tuna? If it does, then they could train a dog to smell for dolphin meat. I can imagine it now, a man in a navy blue uniform walking along a scaffold that over looks the vats of tuna fish puree with a German Sheppard on a leash. The dog catches the scent of dolphin from a vat below. With ears perked, the dog barks and yelps. The guards attention is lifted from a fog of perverted thoughts and he asks the dog, "What is it boy? A poor helpless dolphin minced into a pasty mess down below?" The guard radios into the vat control tower, ! "We have a situation here at vat number six twenty-nine." And just as the tower radios back to him to verify the vat number the dog leaps off the scaffold into the vat taking with him the guard whose hand is tightly clasped to the leash. Both become pureed, mixed with soybean oil and eggs, and then packaged into small cylinders of stainless steal to be shipped off to tens of thousands of Wal-Marts across the country. Meanwhile at the Bumble Bee tuna preparation center, the guard's co-workers tell stories of the night dolphin detection guard that fell in love with his dog, left his wife and two kids to move to Guatemala to marry his German Sheppard and pick coffee beans. The tale becomes legend and the legend becomes myth and soon the guard story becomes fused with the Greek legend of Poseidon, Minos, Pasiphae and the Minotaur. He is then faded from memory like footprints on the beach.
In closing, I like tuna fish, the texture reminds me of chicken, in fact, everything about tuna reminds me of chicken. I wonder if chickens ever fall into the tuna vats, and if so, can a dog tell the difference?
Love always,
Tony Simek
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Simek X-Mas Party
Missy and I went to our first Simek Christmas party together (I think). It was really fun. Joe and Nichol hosted it down at a recreation house in Plainfield. Everyody had a great time and the food was wonderful. The theme was "Feliz Navidad" and we had everything from tacos to tortilla soup. The kids got to bust up a pinata and had a blast (literally). There was a big screen TV and we had the football game on to spice up those rare moments when the conversations lulled. It was excellent. Bravo Joe and Nichol. Vince and Kylene have a hard act to follow up, but no doubt it'll be fun too (come on, we're going be there... of course it'll be exciting).
The pictures are posted below... Copy, print, enjoy...
The pictures are posted below... Copy, print, enjoy...
